On Cooking with Creamer

Taken from an Amazon.com item

During visits to the gas station as kids, my brother and I loved to sneak the free International Delight creamer cups from the coffee area.  We had our parents’ bemused permission, though they usually limited us to one creamer per kid.  Over time, we tried out each flavor, just drinking them straight.  French vanilla quickly became my favorite, and I chose that exclusively.  Of course, with maturity, I restrained myself more... which meant taking one only on “special occasions.”  This changed when I began drinking black tea: I started buying the large bottles of I.D. French vanilla creamer at the grocery, as well as gas-station-sized individual cups to keep at work since fridge space is limited.  
             Of course, I'll still sip French vanilla creamer straight from time to time—usually from a shot glass now—and I can't resist licking the residue in an individual cup after I pour the bulk of the creamer into my tea at work.  However, having all this creamer on hand, I have by experimentation devised several other methods of creamer consumption, some common and some relatively novel.  Behold:

1. Tea (as noted before) (35 calories for tea with one TBSP of creamer)

French vanilla best complements Tazo Organic Chai and unflavored black teas such as English Breakfast.  It tastes amazing in peach black tea, too, but sadly the brand I tried is apparently no longer producing it, and local stores only sell peach herbal (rather than black) tea.  I will note that Earl Gray and many herbals taste better with an unflavored creamer, if any, though French vanilla does alright in a pinch.  However, French vanilla does not at all suit the two teas I’ve tried that use yerba mate.

 

2. Cocoa (roughly 80 calories when made with water)

Fill a mug a little over halfway full of water or milk, and add roughly ¼ part French vanilla creamer.  (Take care to leave enough room in the mug for stirring in the cocoa powder.)  Heat till hot in the microwave, and stir in one heaping spoonful (exact amount to taste) of cocoa powder.  Variations: optionally sprinkle with cayenne pepper, with cinnamon and/or nutmeg and cloves, or a drop or two of peppermint extract.  Enjoy!

3. Fudge in a Mug (180 calories)  

One might alternately think of this like a thick fudge frosting.  Whatever it is, it’s delicious (assuming one likes chocolate).  In a mug, measure 4 TBSP powdered sugar, 2 TBSP cocoa powder, and 1 TBSP French vanilla creamer.  Stir till well-blended, heat 8 seconds in a microwave, and stir till smooth.  Enjoy!  

Note: if the fudge sits out or in the fridge a while and becomes dry and hard, add a little more creamer, reheat, and stir.  To make an 8x8 pan of fudge, change the TBSP measurements above to cups and repeat the heating/stirring as needed before pouring it into a pan to cool.  This variety of fudge will stay softer than most baked recipes even when cool, though it can become unpleasantly hard and brittle when dried out, so cover excess with plastic wrap.

4. Peanut Butter cream treat (2 TBSP peanut butter = around 300 calories)

This, with perhaps a side of salad or tea, serves as dinner sometimes when I’m too lazy to cook, or as a snack between meals.  With a spoon, scoop a large dollop of peanut butter into a mug (2-4 TBSP worth).  Add French vanilla creamer to taste (I use roughly equal parts PB and creamer), and stir till blended.  Note that stirring takes a little while—it’ll look like it won’t blend, then it’ll look chunky, but eventually it will become smooth.  

5. Icing/Frosting

For icing, eyeball a mixture of powdered sugar and a little French vanilla creamer.  Stir in more of one or the other till you have the desired consistency.  Optionally add peanut butter or cocoa powder or some other complementary flavor.  To thicken icing into frosting, add half as much butter or shortening (or a mixture of the two) as the sugar.  (Butter provides flavor, but shortening won’t slide off the side of a cake in warm weather.)

6. French Vanilla Pumpkin Pie

I’ll mention this, though I fear I can’t give you the exact recipe since I can’t recall exactly how I made it.  Perhaps I’d needed a substitute for vanilla or evaporated milk, or simply wanted to experiment with adding French vanilla creamer.  Whatever we did, we liked it.  :)

7. French Vanilla Milk

Many nights, Joel and I will indulge in “milk-caps,” sometimes with plain milk, but other times with a dash (or more) of creamer to make it dessert-like.  I find this variation superior, though generally comparable, to the aspartame- and vanilla-sweetened milk my little brother and I liked to drink as kids.  

8. French Vanilla Ice Cream

French vanilla creamer could substitute for part of a traditional ice cream recipe in a crank-operated device.  However, I also discovered how to make a simple, personal-sized version, though I can’t recommend this treat as much as others since it requires so much time to prepare.  However, if you crave ice cream but not a trip to the store, here’s what you can do: Fill a mug with your desired mixture of milk and creamer.  Stick it in the freezer for about ten to fifteen minutes, then stir.  Return it to the freezer and set a timer so you can stir it every five minutes for perhaps a half hour until you achieve the desired consistency.  To create chocolate ice cream, first heat the milk and creamer and mix in a spoonful of cocoa powder (it mixes in best when it’s warm).  Let it cool, and then commence the freezer/stirring procedure.

       9. French vanilla creamer as Pancake Syrup

Who needs maple syrup, corn syrup, or honey on their pancakes?  Instead, try soaking them in French vanilla creamer.  This combo is especially tasty when using a Belgian pancake mix.  For a little more stick-to-itiveness (or stick-to-your-ribs-ness), make the peanut butter cream treat above and slather that on your pancakes!

     10. Strawberries and Cream
Instead of dipping your strawberries and shortcake in raw sugar, whipped cream, and the like, try coating them in French vanilla creamer—or if you like your cream thicker, sweeten some heavy whipping cream with French vanilla creamer instead of sugar and vanilla before turning on the mixer.

Tell me about your own creamer-inspired recipes in the comments below!

On an E

English needs to add a new word to its dictionaries.

Yes, I know, English surely could use several new words, each designed to convey in one word a concept that currently requires a whole sentence—or a little-known foreign expression—to communicate.  However, I have only one such concept on my mind at present: that wordless, high-pitched noise of delight or exaltation best resembling the sound of the letter E.  One hears it emerge primarily from females who are in a state of excitement.  Por ejemplo…

My best friend whom I’ve not seen in years arrives at my door?  Eeeee!  I just bought the sequel to my favorite book and sit poised to read it?  Eeeee!  I just wrapped my hands around a mug of hot tea and took a sip of vanilla-y-chai bliss?  Eeeee!  I just got off work and get to stay home the rest of the day?  Eeeee!  I see a kitten acting adorably at the animal shelter?  Aww!  I get to keep said kitten?  Eeeee!

For a visual example of this phenomenon, enjoy these panels from a page of Girl Genius (see the full page at girlgeniusonline.com):

Of course, “eeee” already appears in writing—mainly on casual message boards and Facebook posts from what I’ve seen.  When uttered aloud—or when written in a clearly enthusiastic context, such as in the comments under a much-anticipated online announcement—this sound needs no explanation; one can hear the excitement in the speaker’s tone or due to the context.  Unfortunately, the sound is trickier to communicate in prose.  Even in dialog, the sound may require careful word choices or even extra words of clarification lest a reader first assume a character to be shrieking in fright.   (As an example of how not to write an "eeee" of excitement, "Nina opened her mailbox.  'Eeee!' she exclaimed.")

This conundrum is especially felt in narration—when referring to the sound rather than actually having a character utter it.  What does one call this sound?  For example, say one wishes to write something such as “I watched the kitten snuggle the teddy bear and felt like ‘eeee’ing.”  Awk-ward!  Consider also “A long, high-pitched yet silent ‘eeeeeee!’ of joy filled my mind”?  Five words could be eliminated from that bulky sentence if we had a proper word for the sound: “A silent [word] filled my mind.”

If you haven’t guessed the word I have in mind, one might now reasonably ask what this new word should be. 

Humor me as I first rule out existing dictionary words.  “Squeal” may come closest to describing the sound, but the word puts me in mind of a shrill, piggy noise, not necessarily made in delight.  My thesaurus offers several unsatisfactory alternatives, among them cry, moan, and wail (which have such sad connotations), scream (which implies fear or anger), yell or holler (as in “hey, you!”), yelp and squeak (noises too short for an “eeee”), howl (we’re not imitating a wolf!), squawk (nor a chicken), and finally shriek and screech (it’s nothing so discordant).   Certainly, one might refer to the instance when one might make the noise as “geeking out” or “a fangirl/fanboy moment,” but those terms alone don’t necessarily mean the individual made the sound; one can geek out in other ways, as well.

Clearly these won’t do.  Thus, I submit that English dictionaries should accept the word “squee” (with optional extra E’s when uttered).  This onomatopoeia sounds much cuter than “squeal” and expresses the speaker’s sense of delight more accurately than “squeal”’s synonyms.  If that’s not argument enough, it’s already in popular use!  It acts at various times as an exclamation, a noun, and a verb.

• The amusing photo website I Can Has Cheezburger has a “Daily Squee” …um, category?  Subsite?  Page?  Thingy.
• Kaja Folgio from Girl Genius & Agatha H. fame wrote on her latest blog post about the Seattle Steamposium’s voluntary decision to create a Girl Genius cosplay category for their costume contest, after which she wrote,

Excuse me while I squee a bit…

Squeeee!

Okay. I’m good.

• Tvtropes.org has a page defining “squee” as a sound made by fangirls, and the site postulates that it’s a portmandeau of “squeal” and “glee.”  (Reasonable.)  It also includes examples of instances of the sound in games, comics, online, etc. (warning—not all of them appear to be clean).
• Squee! (with the exclamation mark) is the name of a two-woman company designed to assist budding entrepreneurs. 

Plenty more examples may be found on DeviantArt, blogs, and social media sites.  Wikionary even has a definition of it!

            Get with the times, Dictionary.com (and your varied sources, too)!

Interesting Note: I’ve also found in researching this that “Squee” is the name or nickname of several people, real and fictional.

On Loving Nature

Something about the natural world turns practical people into poets.  I marvel when others speak lofty praises about the mountains, gush about the ocean, and babble about rivers.  Is there something I’m missing?  Does my brain not fully translate the input from my eyes?

People tell me pictures and films aren’t the same as The Real Thing.  Certainly one doesn’t get the sounds and smells and feel of the place, or the full panorama and color quality.  Yet to my eyes, the Grand Canyon looks exactly like the pictures.  The experience of being there added nothing but a few photographs of my grumpy expression.  

Rivers tend to be muddy and dull, or else furious and noisy.  Their primary interest for me lies in the changes in sandbars over time and the wildlife and trees on its banks.  

Rocky mountainsides, and those sparsely forested or covered in pines, are frankly rather ugly—in an interesting way, at times, but still not much to look at.  

Hawaii was lovely, and visiting was an experience I’ll never forget, but aside from certain pre-planned events, it made sense to me to enjoy the experience from the lanai overlooking the beach; I preferred to read a book rather than sightsee, considering it was a vacation and that is the sort of activity I found most restful.  

As for the ocean, it’s just is the ocean—not unlike a gigantic lake with extra waves and inhabitants.  Its existence is a matter of fact to me, not something I naturally marvel at.  My eyes aren’t drawn irresistibly toward it; it holds no allure for me as others claim it does for them.  But then, I don’t care much for water sports, either, and I prefer mammals and wood over fish and coral.  (Who doesn’t like dolphins and whales?  But they’re nowhere near as cuddly and gorgeous as cats, domestic or otherwise.)

I think I do appreciate nature, and I’ve tried my hand at nature poems many times over. Unlike the proponents of "grand vistas" such as mountains and oceans, however, my eyes favor rolling grasslands beneath an immense sky, faintly-trodden paths in a deciduous forest, brooks and small waterfalls, and a well-tended garden.  I’ve written before about the comforting sound of rain, the textures and colors of the clouds, the ever-changing majesty of trees, the pristine beauty of a snowy landscape.  These things have more to engage the eye and appreciation, more inherent beauty.  Perhaps familiarity makes these things more precious to me, just as it makes mountains and oceans more inspiring to others.  Or perhaps it’s just a matter of taste.

Similar nature posts:

On Winter, On an Evening Sky, On a Summer Afternoon’s Walk, On Clouds, or On Art vs. Science, On Trees, On Various Thoughts on a Watery Day, On a Serene Summer Rain