Over the decades, Americans have
taken to calling others by their first names, even people in positions of
authority. The common perception of this
phenomena is that we’ve grown more casual with our manner of address. While this is certainly true, I suspect the
shift also indicates something more about our perspective of people and society.
Surnames identify families, so calling
a person by a surname associates that individual with his or her family group
and may even imply that the person’s value (or lack thereof) lies in his or her
family. Similarly, the respectful titles Miss, Mrs, Mr, and Dr
have their uses expressing formal distance, as well as marital or
educational status, but the titles are otherwise even more generic than surnames.
America, being largely a
meritocracy, places more value and emphasis on the individual. Though we still value the family, we are personally
less defined by our familial connections (whatever those might be like), and more defined by our characters and our work,
which all get wrapped up in our sense of self, and that sense of self generally includes our
given names or nicknames. Thus, the phenomena of calling
individuals by their given names seems only natural. As my mom has said, "I feel I am closer to someone when we call each other by our first names. It all seems more honest, plain, and genuine."
It's well known, I believe, that language changes to reflect
culture, and cultural perspectives are affected by language. Now, one could find pros and cons in both
familial and personal forms of address—and in a culture that values collective or
individual contributions and identities—but rather than explore the topic
further, I submit this as food for thought.
What do you value, and how do
your words unconsciously express that? What
should you value, and how might
changing your words reflect and encourage that perspective?